birthday, is in itself, just another ordinary day.
but this ordinary day has been made special.
by gaowei, who has made every attempt to ensure i was smiling, and who spent his last cent on a bouquet of roses. he wanted to get me tulips, but wasnt able to find it at the few florists he went to. so then, roses.
by mummy and daddy, who worried i would be unhappy.
by the many well wishes i received via sms. and those who left a message on my facebook wall.
by yonghui, tanpengngee and the ang sisters for the mj.
and especially so by ah fang, who surprised me at the last moments of the day, appearing with a cake at my house. -_-"
i honestly wanted to let the day pass in peace. i was afraid it might trigger unpleasant memories. but the day went by better than i had expected. sure, there were moments when i got stuck in the 'what-ifs' and 'why-nots' of my very complicated love life and relationship status, but at least i was happy.
i really dont want to think about my relationship with gaowei now. at this point, all i know is that i'm still completely unable to let go of chester. for unknown reasons, a part of me simply refuse to let it go yet. even limchiehsern expressed his surprise at the immensity of my love for him. weird, but true. when you love somebody like super alot, it takes damn fucking long to get over it, or even want to get over it.
i'm going to go nap now. i hope i stop dreaming of chester. because everytime i wake up from those dreams, well, it hurts to know they were merely dreams.
