I'm in love with you

Last night was my worst sleep ever, what with baby elbowing and cornering me the entire night. :(

But today, my boyfriend has been most endearing, and now, I'm feeling guilty as hell for getting pek chek at him yesterday. -.-"

Sigh.

I don't want the iPad already. I want the next generation iPhone, can? :)



All I really want is you,
to stand outside my window,

Throwing pebbles, screaming,
“I’m in love with you”

Work and Bf

Sometimes, I get depressed when I think about the kind of life I'm going to have to live with for the next few years of my life. And yesterday, I think I hit an all-time low.

Abc and I have completely opposite sleeping habits, and this, I've come to see, is inevitable, what with his working hours being a near total inversion of mine. And since I started working, we've taken to meeting when I finish work and before his starts. At 6pm on these days, I'd call to find him in bed and he'd struggle to wake, while I drag my feet to meet him, slightly wishing I could snuggle in my blankie.

And yesterday, it suddenly came to me, how tired we both were and for a split second, I considered the lack of necessity this tiredness was for.

It's not that I didn't want to meet him, because that is far from the truth. I really want to meet my bf. I really do miss him whenever he's not around. But I acknowledge my lack of and the consequential need for sleep. I cannot survive like this for long. I cannot stand my falling asleep at work. I don't like this.

And this is the kind of life I have to content myself with for the next few years. I'm scared. I'm scared we won't pull through. At times, I really feel as if we ought to find people who are going through the same phase in their lives. I think it might be better if he had someone who didn't have to wake up early and who would have as much time for him on weekdays as I did when we first got together. Likewise, for me, if my boyfriend works the office hours that I do.

But I don't want to go through the process of falling in love all over again. And I definitely don't want to fall out of love with the Smelly Pi. He has his issues, I have mine. But we've been more than willing to compromise, and to work things out. I don't think I've been this optimistic about a relationship and I don't want this to end.

And yet, how long can this makeshift compromise last, and as far as I can tell, more thorns are going to pop out along the way. :(

I'm scared. And I'm tired. And I'm yawning and wishing for the time to come when I can flop down in bed.


And I'm pissed because the bf doesn't let me snap as many pictures as I want to. What's the use of having a camera when I can't take picture? :(

I have a smashing new toy that I'm not allowed to play with.

And I want the iPad, however ridiculous the name is. I want the iPad.

-- Post From My PrettyP.

new toy!

Yay-ness is my new toy. :)

And next Saturday, I swear I'll clear the mess in my room, because the following weekend, baby's blocked out to spend it with me! :) (Have a slight feeling that he's going to just take over someone else's shift though, and as usual, I'd be encouraging him to take it, as disappointed as I would be.)

first day at work

At the end of my first day at work. I'm exhausted, if not for the first onslaught of supremely dry information, then my severe lack of sleep. I dozed off in classroom training when there was only 2 of us, and with the trainer sitting right next to me! I'm slightly paranoid whether I snored. Zzz. -.-"

As much as it pains me to realize it's going to be awhile before I can wander into dreamland with baby next to me, I must admit that it's probably the only way I would be sleeping early. Sigh. I'm contemplating whether to wear his stinky singlet to sleep later, because I think I'd need to ration the smell over a couple of day. I MISS MY BOYFRIEND! (and its barely 12 hours since I last saw him. Die la!)

The new colleagues seem promising. And I actually met someone I knew, or rather, was somehow acquainted with. Gw's friend. Kinda awkward that I've actually been to her house for, like half an hour of mj on her b'day and I failed to recognize her. Not surprising considering how things turned out between Gw and myself la.

Succumbed to the laziness of growing out my bangs, so I went to cut off the fringe yesterday. That sub-standard and totally patronizing cheena cut hair guy (I'm completely refraining from using the term hairstylist) told me when he was done, '把它绑起来就很美了'. And then I was greeted by guffaws when I came home, from the irritating brother and my ridiculous boyfriend. :(



Very ugly meh? :(

Am going to go wallow in self pity and maybe sniff baby's shirt. I know I sound like a grossed-out psychopath, and yea, I acknowledge that it's super unhealthy the way I'm obsessing over my bf. That said, I've no plans yet to do anything about it, and my disgustingly scheming bf actually encourages me into missing him more. On the surface, he goes like, 'baby 你不可以这样爱我的.' And the next thing you know, he's basking in that affection and clearly enjoying and totally loving the attention. Sigh. My boyfriend.

Let's see if I see him in my dreamland later. I do hope so. He would know what I'd like to do to him after this morning and the perpetuated lethargy the whole day thereafter.

-- Post From My iPhone. WiWi baby rocks. ^^

I WANT

I'm thinking, since I got my deedpoll done. I would really like to get this. But I can't make up my mind which design. And the lavish bitch in me is not contented with the silver ones (silver tarnishes real easily). Oh well, till when I make up my mind.

In the meantime.



Have already emailed the seller. :)

Going to be broke for awhile. Dirt broke, but happy like fuck.

I know. I don't really need it, in fact, it might become like the Holga, which is still sitting in the box Ah Fang gave it to me in. But that's because I don't know how to use it.

I know I'm rationing the meagre last pay from StarHub till when the next pay comes in (in Feb), I know I should wait till then. But you know what, impulse buys are fucking exciting, and I haven't been this hyped up in the longest time. :)

Well, I'm not exactly unhappy, it's just that these days, I feel as though my life is fading into obscurity. Soon, I'll be one of those half-dead corporate world zombies, and baby's planning on getting busy with his friends on my precious weekends.

Truth be told, it scared me a little when my boyfriend suddenly decided that he's going to want to commit his Friday or Saturday nights to his friends, but I guess if it makes him happy, we'll just have to work our way around it. The feeling of being friend-less sucks, I would know that, so I hope he doesn't have to feel that way again. Besides, there's still Sundays and the weekday stay-overs. :)

So there, PLEASE ASK ME OUT. :(

I think I'm friendless, as in, I have nobody to ask out.
Rather, I don't know who to ask out. :(
But, if you think you're my friend, ask me out k? :)

I'm serious.

2010

Happy 2010!! :)

It was a little disappointing trying to catch the fireworks from so far away. Next year, I want to be squeezing with throngs of people to catch them in their full awe-inspiring glory.


Nope, no New Year's resolution because I never keep them anyway.

My 2009 has been filled with blessings in plenty of disguises.
Like drowning my phone 10 days into the year that led to my fantabulous iPhone purchase. Still loving it, totally.
Like losing my job, finding the worst ever job and eventually nabbing something that will be paying reasonably well. :)
Like devastatingly breaking the heart of him who loved me more than anyone ever had, only to find my happy, love pill hidden elsewhere. :)


Life has never been so promising, and we're so going to continue our streak of happiness, I'm not even going to wish for it.

2010 will be a blast!